ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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