when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
