In America we eat man semen.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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