Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
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