Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
