yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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