Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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