dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
my liver is dry heaving
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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