question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Randomize