why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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