Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize