i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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