need another drink. this is the easiest way
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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