I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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