I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize