Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
