that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
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