I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Randomize