you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
