I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
