I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
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