Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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