I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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