Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
