Pappa wants mamma naked
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
