hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Come on in and take your pants off
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
