I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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