i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
