If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I'm always down for nudity.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
