Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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