I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
