The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
