i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize
