So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I know her cup size but not her name....
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
