I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Can you bring me the toilet please
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
