It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Bang-toberfest begins!!
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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