we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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