Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize