I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Randomize
