I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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