More tranny stories later!
It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
23 People Confess The Trashiest Thing They’ve Seen In Person
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Sex on roller skates
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
19 Transgender People Reveal The First Sign That They Were Trans
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me