I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
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