And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I woke up under a house in Key West
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
