Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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