Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
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