Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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