Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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