I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
