apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I will be naked everywhere
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Randomize
