Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
