omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
